A Picture! Cuz Pictures are Fun!

You know what bothers me?

All these words. Everytime I check this place, it's covered with words. So... I added that picture of cards on the top right. I don't really know what it means or symbolizes, but it's pretty.

So there.

But, still, it's on the dull side. So I thought I'd look through some not-so-old-yet-not-so-recent pictures I have. Keeping in mind that I perform primarily walkaround and close-up, I have performed in a couple of stage/parlour venues. But stage stuff tends to require either effects that require no props at all - or effects that require huge props.

With cost in mind, I've turned to mentalism. And, through it, I've learned a lot about presentation. Anyway, I was performing on campus for fellow students, their parents, and their siblings (it was Family Weekend). It was a charity thing... where all proceeds go to the local high school library.

Yeah. I still can't seem to gather the guts to ask people to pay me for shows. And... well... this was for charity.

Anyway - mentalism. Looking back, I performed decently... throwing in a few new effects. I didn't really like my routine, though, and I think I scripted too heavily for me to perform as naturally and comfortably as I should. I think... being on stage pulls me a bit out of my comfort level.

I'm not going to post all my pictures, but I wanted to post one. Because the photographer caught me totally off guard here - at a time when I was having the most fun.


This is me performing Luke Jermay's Dangerous Opener. I found a cardboard box, covered it with an old black t-shirt to make it pretty, and pushed a knife through it. The knife is stabilized with a big textbook beneath the box and covered with the red cup. A spectator named a cup for me to destroy... and I smashed it.

I admit I was nervous performing it for the first time...
But, man, it was fun.

So... yeah, I thought I'd show you that. A picture of me, caught in a moment of... personal astonishment and joy.

What can I say? I like smashing things.

Magic Pockets

Back when DOS was still popular, I played this two-dimensional game that involved a kid with an entire world inside his pockets. He lost his skates (or something)... so he dove into his pockets, and thereby forever wandered around in this new world... without his pants.

Ok. An interesting image... but not funny. Still, he did wander around this new world, defending himself from little slimey monsters with the inexhaustible supply of fruit that he had. Essentially, he had every magicians' dreams - bottomless pockets.

I remember envying guys for the HUGE pockets that they have in their cargo pants. Even their jeans pockets seemed bigger than mine. And, in professional wear, guys' suits have all these hidden pockets everywhere. On the other hand, you'd rarely find a pocket in a dress or even in "woman's suits." Sure, we have purses... but purses are a hassle to carry around. And, if you watch fashion trends, you'll notice that purses are getting smaller and smaller.

Regardless of the fashion faux pas, I used to walk around with lumpy pockets - filled with cards and everything else. I used to wear jackets and sweaters just for the extra pockets, somewhat glad that it's always cold where I live. But, lately, my pockets are emptying. Instead of carrying six decks of cards with me everywhere, I'm only carrying one.

Sometimes, I don't even have a deck of cards on me.

Does this mean I'm getting lazy? I don't know because I'm still definitely prepared to perform. I always have coins on me, there's always a spare pen lying around, there's always paper... and, in the end, I always have my hands. I always have my words.

Is my focus shifting from close-up card magic to mentalism? I don't think so. Card magic is still my forte, and I always bring them when I plan to perform. When I plan actively to go out and perform, I have at least a deck of cards with me - if not more. But when I don't plan to perform - when someone wants to see something and I don't have cards on me - I still do something (if the magic bug calls). I would twist my arm, go through a pen and pen cap routine, play with a coin, or... if the mood strikes... get a piece of paper for some mentalism.

And yet.. if I had the choice and the deck in my pockets, I would still use them.

I'd like to think that this means I'm transforming from someone who's always prepared to perform - someone who strives to appear like a magician - to someone who can just perform spontaneously. Maybe it's a step forward. Maybe it's a phase.

And I wonder... am I the only one who's experiencing this? Is this a sign of a plateau - a pause - in my magic education? Or have others gone through this as well? Are others going through it?
Any thoughts?

This is My Letter to the World

This is my first post - my first attempt at a blog - and, thus, I will begin with a little bit about myself. First, as the title tells you...

I am an amateur magician.

I have been learning and performing since 2002. I have considered myself a magician for six years now. And, still, I consider myself to be an amateur magician. This label that I've put on myself doesn't mean that I haven't learnt anything in six years. It doesn't mean that I don't consider my art seriously.

It simply means that I recognize how short six years really is. It means that, when I look around at the world of magicians hidden in the depths of the internet - when I look at all these people and all the things that I have yet to learn - I know that I still have a long way to go.

Why, then, is a nineteen-year-old amateur magician starting her own blog? What sage advice can she give? Is she going to come up with new effects? New routines? Is she going to offer product reviews when there are already plenty of those around - when there are probably hundreds of others out there from magicians with more experience?

It's a possibility. But probably not. Probably not for a long time.

Then maybe reading all that was just a waste of your time.

Then again, maybe it's time we look at magic from a different perspective. I'm not sure what exactly I have to offer here, but I figured my thoughts are a good place to start. I figured my experiences as a magician and a person, riddled with the mistakes and luck of a beginner and a young adult (wow, I'm almost 20)... I figured that all this might help some people look at magic in a different way.

And, along the way, I know that I'll learn something. More than a simple "me writing down my thoughts," I know that you and others like you will show me their way of walking and dancing. I know that you'll dig a path for me to follow, as will others. I know that I'll look at them - probably admire them with an open mouth and a certain kind of awe - and then come up with my own way to walk and dance. I'll explore your roads and find another road for myself.

It's my fault that I've stayed away from the online magical community for so long. The intricacies of the internet and forums and cafes... they've always eluded me. They still do. I don't know much about the politics of magicians, and I don't care much about them.

But I do want to step out from the bubble where I live. I want to poke my head out of this fog, so that I can see, at last, this wide world that lies before me. I want to speak with other magicians. I want to meet other magicians.

So, with that, I would like to take this time to say hello.

Hi.
My name is Felice.
I'm glad we're meeting at last.